Monday, December 20, 2010

Anatomy of a Mermaid

I'm rocking Isaac, feeding him his nighttime bottle of milk and Jesse is in the bathroom giving Brooke her bath.  This is what I hear:

"Brrr," Brooke said.

"Why you saying brrr?  Mermaids don't get cold in the water," Jesse replies.  Then Brooke stood, and Jesse said, "How are you standing up, Mermaid?  Mermaids can't stand up with a tail."  (I can't see this, but Jesse told me that she sat back down in the tub and did her best "Ariel on the Rock" impersonation.)  "Mermaids are like this," she said.

Then he got her out of the tub, and she was saying Brrrr again.  "Mermaids don't wear clothes.  They're butt naked," Jesse informed her.  Then I hear Riley pipe up, "Mermaids wear tails and bras.  They're not butt naked.  And they don't have butts."

"They do have butts.  How do you think they poop?" said Jesse.  Riley replied, "Mermaids don't poop.  They just eat, and eat, and eat and it just disappears."

And then a voice from the girls' bedroom belonging to Savvy says, exasperated, "Mermaids don't exist."

"You've seen your fish poop, right?  Mermaids poop just like your fish," Jesse explained.  Then Brooke says, "I'm not a mermaid.  I have a bum hole.  See?"  And then bends over.